I drove to LA from San Diego yesterday to see some friends. It was one of those magical drives when I left just at the right time, beating traffic and getting into that current of early risers that moves at a got-somewhere-to-go pace.
Driving is something I really enjoy when there’s no traffic. It’s my time to sit back and listen to music, maybe call some friends I haven’t talked to in a long time.
When I hit Oceanside which is about 45 minutes out from my place, I noticed a beat-up VW bus tinkering along in the next lane up ahead of me. It had to be 40 years old and on its last legs… literally: all of its tires were bright green-rimmed spares.
My heart automatically sank to think of the financial hardship that person must be going through. I remembered how I had felt when I was living paycheck to paycheck, every financial decision racked with anxiety and guilt. It was a wet, wool blanket on top of the depression.
As I got closer, however, my mind started to shift.
In spite of its old age, spray-painted sunflowers twisted across the outer panels, brightening up the entire exterior. As I drove by the driver’s side window, I couldn’t help but look in.
She was a 20-something in big, round glasses, disheveled hair in a bun, sun-kissed as if it weren’t winter…
And she was singing. Swaying back and forth to music I couldn’t hear. Smiling.
My assumption that she was in a certain state because that’s where I had been smacked me right in the face. While I didn’t mean to, I had judged her and placed a “struggling” label on her because that was my own experience.
I let “just getting by” usurp my entire being when I was struggling, adding to the darkness I lived in day-to-day. But obviously, that’s not the only way to do it. This shiny sunflower girl wasn’t letting the fact that she was driving on all spares shadow what she has. She didn’t let it keep her from singing, being in the sun, living.
Maybe just getting by is enough. Maybe it’s something to be grateful for. It’s better than not getting by. And what good would it do to focus on what you don’t have instead of what you do?
Our culture tells us we need to live big, dream big, spend big at every turn. It’s easy to get distracted from the fact that if we’re still breathing, we’re okay. Comparison is so much easier than celebration when you’re taught to keep up with the Joneses you’re entire life.
If you’re “just getting by” right now (especially during the holiday season when expectations are high), how would it feel to accept and celebrate that you are getting by, even if you’d like to bring in more?
It’s my belief that acceptance + gratitude + focus = manifestation. Whether you believe the same or not, there’s no harm in recognizing that there is good here so that the journey there is more joyful.
Stay strong,
Amy
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